General News
Local parent completely fucked if Timmy asks about long division

Local home schooling parents James and Janette Bogroll have today realised they know absolutely nothing about anything, after attempting to teach their child third grade arithmetic for half an hour.

Asked by son Timmy to double check his working, the parents stared blankly at the sheet, before shrugging and declaring it’s “probably right” before doing the sums on their phones.

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“How the hell do you divide 12 by 5?” asked a bemused James. “Okay I think I’ve got it, according to Google we’re going to need to find a stick in the shape of a Y.”

The incident has already drastically changed the dynamic in the household, with son Timmy being forced to sit his parents down and re-teach them the entirety of years 2-3 of the education curriculum. “I’ve had to tell them three times now what an adjective is,” explained Timmy. “I’m not looking forward to when we get to geography. I’m pretty sure I overheard dad once say Portugal is in South America. And god help me if mum refers to Scott Morrison as the President again. It’s first grade civics! How are they so bad at this stuff?”

Timmy’s parents have explained that as adults, they have more important things to worry about, such as investing money, managing household bills, and filing taxes, all of which they also know absolutely nothing about.

The Chaser