Report: Oh no, not again

“Oh fuck,” reported the world today, as exit polling indicated that Joe Biden may not have the lead over Donald Trump.

“Literally nobody could have predicted this,” explained experts, “we had no precedent for this happening at all, except maybe the last time this exact same thing happened.”

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However, it is not all bad news, with America electing its first transgender representative to their senate. “I am honored to be elected and represent you,” said Sarah McBride, “and I look forward to helping govern this over for the three weeks it has left.”

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