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“What makes you think I’m racist?” asks man who got a trophy for all the immigrants he jailed

Prime Minister Scott Morrison has today pledged to sign a document declaring he is not racist, in a move that is sure to settle the issue once and for all. “Sure I may only be Prime Minister because of all the immigrants I locked up on an island prison, but that doesn’t mean I’m racist!” explained Morrison. “I’ve also imprisoned a lot of poor white people for getting paid too much by Centrelink, so in the end I think you’ll find I’m equally sociopathic to all races.”

“I hang out with people of different races all the time,” continued Morrison. “Just ask person of colour Karl Stefanovic. I love all races from white to caucasian!”

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Deputy Prime Minister Barnaby Joyce has also come out in defence of the Prime Minister, stating he has seen no evidence of the Prime Minister being racially biased. “Morrison is a saint,” explained Barnaby. “If you could all just ignore those texts that leaked where I called him a lying underhanded monster, you can rest assured that I think the Prime Minister is a wonderful, lovely man who would never racially profile a rival.”




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